King Arthur was getting ready to go on a Quest. He was worried about
leaving Queen Guinevere alone with all those horny knights of the
Round Table. So he went to Merlin for some advice. After explaining
his predicament to Merlin, the wizard looked thoughtful and said to
come back in a week and he'd see if he could come up with something.
A week later King Arthur was back in Merlin's laboratory where the
good wizard was showing him his latest invention. It was a chastity
belt, except it had a rather large hole in the most obvious place.
"This is no good, Merlin!" the king exclaimed, "Look at this opening.
How is this supposed to protect m'lady, the Queen?"
"Ah, sire, just observe," said Merlin as he searched his cluttered
work bench until he found what he was looking for.
He then selected his most worn out wand, one that he was going to
discard anyway. He then inserted it in the gaping aperture of the
chastity belt whereupon a small guillotine blade came down and cut it
neatly in two. "Merlin, you are a genius!" said the grateful monarch,
"Now I can leave, knowing that my Queen is fully protected." After
putting Guinevere in the device, King Arthur then set out upon his
Several years passed until he returned to Camelot. Immediately he
assembled all his knights in the courtyard and had them drop their
trousers for an informal 'short arm' inspection. Sure enough! Each
and every one of them was either amputated or damaged in some way.
All of them except Sir Galahad. "Sir Galahad", exclaimed King Arthur,
"The one and only true knight! Only you among all the nobles have
been true to me. What is it in my power to grant you? Name it and it
But Sir Galahad was speechless.
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