Promoting Safe Sex in Russia

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Recently, President Clinton and Boris Yeltsin had a conference on the
spread of AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases in their countries.
Yeltsin asked Clinton how he and his administration are attempting to
stop the spread of AIDS. "We promote abstinence in the United States,"
Clinton told him.

"That would never work in the USSR," Yeltsin replied. "People are going
to have sex, and the government can't do or say anything to stop that. I want
to promote the use of condoms in my country. The problem is, we don't have
any good condom companies in Russia."

"Well, in the US we have many condom companies, and one of the best is
Trojan," Clinton told him. "Let me give the president of the company a call.
I'll ask him to send some condoms to you, so you can distribute them in your
country. How many do you want?"

"We'd probably need about 5 million or so to start," Yeltsin replied.

"Okay. That should be no problem." Clinton thought for a second, then

"You will probably want a variety of sizes, right?"

"No," said Yeltsin. "All of the condoms should be the regulation 10 inches
long and 2 inches wide."

"10 inches long!? 2 inches wide!?" thought Clinton, but he said only,
"That should be no problem, Boris." Mr. Yeltsin thanked the president, and
they parted ways.

When Clinton got back to the Oval Office, he called the president of the
Trojan Condom Company. "I need a favor from you, Peter," said Clinton. "I
need you to send about 5 million condoms to Boris Yeltsin in the USSR.
The condoms must be 10 inches long and 2 inches wide. On each condom,
I want you to write 'MADE IN THE USA' on one side, and 'SIZE MEDIUM'
on the other."

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These all are jokes that we've had the good fortune of having other people email to us or we've retrieved off the Internet. Over time, we've sent them on to the subscribers of our various jokes lists. Since we're talking some ten years of managing these emails lists, we've built up a pretty sizeable (and FUNNY) collection of jokes. They cover pretty much any category and topic that you can imagine; from clean jokes to dirty jokes and most everything in between, including the much loved lawyer jokes and the blonde jokes and the yo mama jokes as well as those redneck jokes. Remember, we did NOT author them, but we did take the time to convert the text files to html.

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