25 Christmas ideas to torture your roomate
JokeTribe - THE Best Humor Archive of Funny Jokes
  1. Claim you were a Christmas tree in your former life. If s/he tries to bring one into the room, scream bloddy murder and trash on the floor.

  2. Go to the mall with your roomate and sit on Santa's lap. Refuse to get off.

  3. Wear a Santa suit all the time. Deny you're wearing it.

  4. Sit in a corner in the fetal position rocking back and forth chanting, "Santa Claus is coming to town, Santa Claus is coming to town..."

  5. Hang mistle-toe in the doorway. When your roomate enters or leaves the room, plant a wet one on his/her lips.

  6. Hang a stocking with your roomates name on it. Collect coal and sharp

    objects in it. If s/he asks, say "you've been very naughty this year."

  7. Paint your nose red and wear antlers. Constantly complain about how you never get to join in on the reindeer games.

  8. Make conversation out of Christmas Carols. (I.E. "You know, I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus underneath the mistle-toe last night.")

  9. Wrap yourself in Christmas lights and roll around in the snow.

  10. Sing: "All I want for Christmas is my roomate's two front teeth..."

  11. Give your roomate the gifts from the twelve days of Christmas song.

  12. Build a snowperson with your roomate and place a hat on its head. When it doesn't come to life, cry hysterically "it didn't work!"

  13. Whip your roomate screaming "now Dasher, now Dancer, now Donner, and Blitzen, etc."

  14. Tear down all your roomate's Christmas decorations yelling "Bah Humbug!"

  15. Wake up every morning screaming "Ghost of Christmas Future, please have mercy on my soul!"

  16. Tell your roomate you're moving out. Santa's buying you a house on 34th Street.

  17. Pin a pointsetta to your lapel.

  18. Make anatomically correct gingerbread people and eat the best parts first.

  19. Put on a fake white beard and insist that all your roomate's friends "give it a yank."

  20. Ring jingle bells maniacally saying "every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings."

  21. Stand in front of the mirror reciting "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" over and over in your underwear.

  22. Smoke mistle-toe. Do what comes naturaly.

  23. Watch your roomate when s/he is sleeping. When s/he wakes up sing, "he sees you when you're sleeping..."

  24. Steal a life size nativity scene and display it in your room. When your roomate asks, tell him/her "I had to let them stay here, there's no room at the inn."

  25. When your roomate goes to the bathroom, rearrange his/her posessions. Tell him/her that Santa's elves must have done it.



Click here for the next christmas joke

About JokeTribe


These all are jokes that we've had the good fortune of having other people email to us or we've retrieved off the Internet. Over time, we've sent them on to the subscribers of our various jokes lists. Since we're talking some ten years of managing these emails lists, we've built up a pretty sizeable (and FUNNY) collection of jokes. They cover pretty much any category and topic that you can imagine; from clean jokes to dirty jokes and most everything in between, including the much loved lawyer jokes and the blonde jokes and the yo mama jokes as well as those redneck jokes. Remember, we did NOT author them, but we did take the time to convert the text files to html.

If you are certain of the authorship of any of these, email us the author's name along with relevant information on how we can verify that they truly are the author so we can give them the credit that they deserve.

 

The difference between web surfing with IE and Firefox is the difference between body armor and a trendy cotton vest

 

We've all heard the stories. Stories about innocently searching the internet with Internet Explorer when, all of a sudden, all the alarms are going off with your virus scanner. Programs are installing themselves. Warnings about Smitfraud-C, SpyAxe, and Vcodec are popping up on your screen.

And some of us have had firsthand experience. Firsthand experience that has led us away from IE and to other browsers like Firefox.

And why is that? Well, virus writers are generally going to be trying to get the most bang for their buck, ,just like everyone else. That's why. And IE currently provides them with that. It still has the largest market share, likely due in large part that it comes preinstalled on most computers.

But just because it's preinstalled doesn't mean you have to use it and expose yourself to all the spyware and virii targetted to it. You can do what an ever growing portion of users out there are doing. You can switch to

 

Browse Amazon Bestsellers

 

Google
Web JokeTribe