As presented on the 04/04/96 broadcast of LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN
10. Whenever they show sketch of Unabomber on TV, he says, "What
a good looking guy!"
9. Subscribes to "Dangerously Quiet Loner" magazine
8. Always bragging that he's "bombed more than Joe Piscopo"
7. Even in baby pictures, he's wearing a hood and sunglasses
6. He's a twisted recluse who considers himself above the laws of
society -- wait, no, that's Michael Jackson
5. Asks his friends to call him "Una" for short
4. Keeps doing his lame impression of Jimmie "J.J." Walker saying "Dy-no-mite!"
3. He's been trying frantically to get a hold of Johnnie Cochran
2. May 8, 1970: Becky Johnson turns him down for the prom; May 9, 1970: Becky Johnson explodes
1. Favorite cable channel? TNT