Microsoft Democracy a part of Win96

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Microsoft has unveiled today Microsoft Democracy, a freeware that will
be widely available from next month, and included in Windows 96, the
Company's latest operating system, to be released later this year.

Microsoft Democracy will enable any Windows-based computer user to vote
from his home, for any election, including presidential. For new Windows
users, Microsoft Democracy will come installed automatically with
Windows 96, without any human intervention needed. The system will use
the Microsoft Network to connect to governmental databases in order to
register these new on-line votes. Users will simply have to click on the
icon of the candidate of their choice on the day of the election, and
voting procedure will be fully automatic.

Detractors say it is not fair that the system only includes Bill Gates{s
own icon on startup, but even though the Company wouldn't comment
officially, sources close to Microsoft say that it should be possible to
vote for candidates other than Bill Gates with to-be-released upgrades.
These upgrades should include all the candidates for a given election,
and should be available at least a week before each election, for as low
as $99.99 (again, voting with just the initial version will be possible
anytime). In these upgrades, candidate names of more than five
characters will also be possible, sources say.

Opponents also complain that installation with Windows 96 is invisible,
and that some users may not be aware that MS Democracy has been
installed, and is running in their computer. To that, Microsoft opposes
that installation is automatic by default, in order to simplify human
interventions; automatic operation is clearly explained in the MS
Democracy User's Manual, available on-line through MSN, or on the
Internet. Also, the user can turn off default voting, just by clicking
the Don't always vote for default candidate box, in the Custom
Installation / Other Settings / MS Democracy / Advanced Options
sub-menu during Windows 96 installation.

Every voter using the system for the first time will receive a free
CD-ROM biography of Bill Gates (MS Dangerous Creatures).

The company expects to distribute 150 million copies of the basic
software, and about 500 upgrades within the first year.

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These all are jokes that we've had the good fortune of having other people email to us or we've retrieved off the Internet. Over time, we've sent them on to the subscribers of our various jokes lists. Since we're talking some ten years of managing these emails lists, we've built up a pretty sizeable (and FUNNY) collection of jokes. They cover pretty much any category and topic that you can imagine; from clean jokes to dirty jokes and most everything in between, including the much loved lawyer jokes and the blonde jokes and the yo mama jokes as well as those redneck jokes. Remember, we did NOT author them, but we did take the time to convert the text files to html.

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