Twisted Greeting Cards by Alan Meiss, email@example.com
We're sorry you now mourn the loss
of your beloved cat.
For if we had only braked in time,
it wouldn't be so flat.
The frost is on the meadow,
the dew upon the grass.
Here's your stinking birthday card,
now shove it up your *ahem*.
I've tender thoughts and memories
I'd never been so close to you,
for it was more than souls we bared.
But I've since come to have regrets
and wonder if we erred,
For now the sores have failed to heal,
and I'm getting really scared.
Golden fields of daffodils,
sparkling mountain streams,
Crisp clean air and cotton clouds,
vistas from our dreams.
But all throughout our lovely trip,
to thoughts of you we've clung,
Because you'll never see these things
in your iron lung.
I think upon a special time,
one that I shall miss.
A moonlit walk upon the shore,
a hug and then a kiss.
And though I'd like to write some more,
I really have to piss.