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Some good news, some bad news |
There was this multi-millionaire who had absolutely everything, money (obviously), a country mansion, a beautiful wife, race horses, everything that a man could want. In fact he was so rich that he decided to go off to Africa on a three month safari to shoot big game.
When he got back, the chauffeur driven Rolls had just got to the large, ornate gates at the foot of the drive to the set back house, when it was met by Jeeves, the butler. The millionaire wound down the window of the Rolls and said "Hello Jeeves, what on earth are you doing here?"
The butler replied "Well sir, I've got some good news and some bad news." "Tell me the bad news first then." answered the millionaire. "Well sir," started Jeeves "I don't know how to tell
you this, but your favourite dog Reggie has died." "Good God, not poor old Reggie, how did it happen?" "Well sir, your two million pound race horse, Lucky Strike fell on him." "That's terrible, why?" replied the millionaire. "Well sir, a beam from the stable roof collapsed on him." said Jeeves. "Why, what happened to the stable?" "Well sir, it was on fire at the time." "That's awful Jeeves how did the stable catch fire?" "We think it was a spark from the house sir." "Oh no, the house has burnt down, how did the fire start Jeeves?" "The wind blew over one of the candles on your wife's coffin sir." "Good Lord, Angela died, why Jeeves" "Well sir, she had a heart attack when she heard the news that your company had crashed on the stock market." "I'm flabbergasted, tell me the good news Jeeves." To which Jeeves replied..................
"Sir, your tomatoes have ripened early."
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About JokeTribe
These all are jokes that we've had the good fortune of having other people email to us or we've retrieved off the Internet. Over time, we've sent them on to the subscribers of our various jokes lists. Since we're talking some ten years of managing these emails lists, we've built up a pretty sizeable (and FUNNY) collection of jokes. They cover pretty much any category and topic that you can imagine; from clean jokes to dirty jokes and most everything in between, including the much loved lawyer jokes and the blonde jokes and the yo mama jokes as well as those redneck jokes. Remember, we did NOT author them, but we did take the time to convert the text files to html.
If you are certain of the authorship of any of these, email us the author's name along with relevant information on how we can verify that they truly are the author so we can give them the credit that they deserve.
Why we switched to Firefox
We've all heard the stories. Stories about innocently searching the internet with Internet Explorer when, all of a sudden, all the alarms are going off with your virus scanner. Programs are installing themselves. Warnings about Smitfraud-C, SpyAxe, and Vcodec are popping up on your screen.
And some of us have had firsthand experience. Firsthand experience that has led us away from IE and to other browsers like Firefox.
And why is that? Well, virus writers are generally going to be trying to get the most bang for their buck, ,just like everyone else. That's why. And IE currently provides them with that. It still has the largest market share, likely due in large part that it comes preinstalled on most computers.
But just because it's preinstalled doesn't mean you have to use it and expose yourself to all the spyware and virii targetted to it. You can do what an ever growing portion of users out there are doing. You can switch to
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