Quotes on computers

JokeTribe - THE Best College Humor Archive of Funny Jokes

Apropos to nothing and everything:

My view of Microsoft is that they had two goals in the last 10 years: to copy the Macintosh and to copy Lotus' success in the applications business. And they accomplished those goals. Now, they're kind of lost.
- Steve Jobs

We are the salvation of the world. If you market the tools for salvation, you have to be incompetent not to make money.
- Andrew Grove, co-founder of Intel

Data is flying around, across and through your systems at speeds the Jetsons could appreciate, but has any of this technology let you go home one minute early? I doubt it.
- Richard Santalesa

Programmers often neglect proper consideration of the weak link in the software: the person who will be using it.
- Leonard Lee



We fear what we do not understand, and so ordinary people fear computers more than they fear filing cabinets.
- F.J.M. Laver

Word cannot edit the unknown.
- Wise error message from Word 6.0

Yea, from the table of my memory I'll wipe away all trivial fond records . . .
- Hamlet, experiencing a system crash in 1603

A fine calculation you are making! It is plain you don't know the ins and outs of the printers . . . .
- Don Quixote, dealing with an early interfacing problem, as quoted by Miguel de Cervantes, 1615

We know that the most advanced computer in the world does not have a brain as sophisticated as that of an ant. True, we could say that of many of our relatives, but we only have to put up with them at weddings or special occasions.
- Woody Allen

and some good news:

With computers getting more popular and complex, industry experts predict a growing need for computer nerds. In fact, one industry group forecasts a nerd gap in the coming years as demand outstrips supply.
- James McIntyre

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About JokeTribe

These all are jokes that we've had the good fortune of having other people email to us or we've retrieved off the Internet. Over time, we've sent them on to the subscribers of our various jokes lists. Since we're talking some ten years of managing these emails lists, we've built up a pretty sizeable (and FUNNY) collection of jokes. They cover pretty much any category and topic that you can imagine; from clean jokes to dirty jokes and most everything in between, including the much loved lawyer jokes and the blonde jokes and the yo mama jokes as well as those redneck jokes. Remember, we did NOT author them, but we did take the time to convert the text files to html.

If you are certain of the authorship of any of these, email us the author's name along with relevant information on how we can verify that they truly are the author so we can give them the credit that they deserve.